On Many Subjects

I am so neglecting my blog. But, I had a new grandson, had to write a 40 page paper for school, and I am getting ready to move in two weeks. Give me a freaking break, will ya?

CoWorker: OHMYGOD! THERE IS A HUGE SPIDER ON MY CHAIR. Me: A WHAT? CW: A spider. A HUGE spider. Me: I am not coming into your office for any reason until you get rid of your cheesy visitor. CW: I need to use your phone so I can call a man. Me: Who would that be? CW: Pete is closet. She makes the call and summons the man. Pete: What's up? CW: A spider in my chair. Pete: What? You hire a new employee? CW: Very funny. Kill it. Pete: He is hairy. Me: It is confirmed. It IS my ex-husand. Pete: So, do you mind if I kick his ass? Me: Not at all. A moment of silence, then: CW: OHMYGOD! He squished it. Pete: I thought that's what you wanted. CW: But, I have spider guts on my chair. Pete: Well, get a paper towel and clean it off. CW: No way! I am not touching that. Pete leaves and returns with a paper towel. Pete: Ok. Your chair is clean. CW: Thank you. Me: My hero! They will make a comic book series based on you. Pete: They already did. It is called Spider Man.

I know it is totally politically correct to be organic these days. Just go to the grocery store and you can find organic fruits and veggies and even organic milk produced by organic cows. No chemicals allowed. Keepin gthat in mind, can some PLEASE explain to me what an organic dry cleaners is all about? I thought dry cleaning clothes was all about using chemicals, harsh harmful chemicals. Speaking of veggies: (This from a phone conversation) What does Chuck Norris eat when he wants a salad? A vegetarian. Sidebar to Mom: That is yet another silly senseless Chuck Norris joke that seems to be everywhere these days. They are specifically designed to portray Chuck Norris as a real man's man, bigger, stronger, faster. It is rumored that Superman wears Chuck Norris Underoos. And in Fantasy Football, my league's draft was cancelled last night and rescheduled for today. So, I don't yet know who is on my fantasy football's famtasy dream-team. Already people are getting...